As a young teen when my first mental illness symptoms showed up, I was adamantly against seeing a certified therapist. I bought into the stigma that mental illnesses were something to be ashamed of as if I became mentally ill because of something I did or didn’t do. That mindset changed in my mid-twenties when some trusted mentors came around me with compassion and showed me that mental illness is actually quite common. I finally sought the help I needed, which included talk therapy with a certified mental health counselor.
Over the next twenty or so years I’ve had four therapists. There have been positives and negatives about all of them. Here are some things I’ve learned along the way:
Who Should Go to Therapy?
If you have a mental illness, absolutely, you should go without question. The times I’ve been under the care of a therapist during a bipolar episode, I’ve fared far better than the times when I have not. I learned that waiting until my mental illness flares up is the wrong time to be seeking out a counselor because they just don’t have a baseline. If you have a mental illness, you should have a relationship with a counselor established.
However, I also believe that everyone can benefit from having a non-biased outside perspective on their life at various times whether or not they are mentally ill. When you are walking through a trial, a therapist can really help.
Should Your Therapist Share Your Faith?
I used to believe that 100%, your therapist should absolutely share your faith. My relationship with Jesus Christ is the most important part of who I am, so when I’m seeking counsel from someone, I want them to completely be on the same page as me. However, my thoughts on the subject have recently changed.
Over the past few months I’ve been connected with a therapist whose faith I know nothing about. She’s supportive of my faith and encourages me in it, but she hasn’t expressed mutuality. I’m seeing her specifically because she’s the only therapist I can afford at the moment. I have a great spiritual support system in place to support me on my Christian journey, and my therapist is just a small part of my life journey. I realized that she gets my mental illnesses and that is what matters.
I would say that if you don’t have a strong community of close relationships with people who share your same faith, then when you are seeking a counselor, you should definitely look for one that can speak into the spiritual side of things as well.
What if I Can’t Afford Therapy?
I completely understand this. I’ve been through some really bad flare-ups of my bipolar disorder without having a therapist because I simply could not afford one. Therapy can be really expensive! A lot of therapists will work on a sliding scale–that is, they will charge less based on your income. However, when you are as poor as I am, even that is too costly.
I recently learned of a program through my local county health department. I now pay $3 per visit with both a psychiatrist and a certified counselor. My medications are at no cost. I don’t know what might be available in your area, but I encourage you to do some digging if finances are preventing you from getting the help you need. This program I found has been a huge blessing to me and my family.
What Should I Talk About With My Therapist?
You can talk about whatever you want with your therapist. My experience is that they want you to guide the conversation and only open up as much or as little as you want while you get to know them and get more comfortable with them. That said, here are some topics that have been helpful for me:
- Relationships with family, co-workers, or those in your immediate circle
- Mental health symptoms you are experiencing currently
- Mental health symptoms that have hindered you in the past
- Goals or dreams you have for yourself and what might be preventing you from reaching them
- Current life events
If you’ve never considered talk therapy before, what’s stopping you? I encourage you to navigate those obstacles and engage in therapy, even just for a season.
Bethany Marinelli is an author and speaker out of Orlando, Florida. She also supports her husband, Andrew, in his auto repair business and homeschools their son, Arthur.
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