How to “Be of Good Cheer” in the Darkest Days

How would you like it, if in one of your darkest moments, someone sat next to you and said, “Be of good cheer!” Yeah, me too. I think I would give them a look that said, “You’ve got to be kidding me.” I’m having a really hard time and you’re telling me, “Be of good cheer?”

Jesus says this exact thing to five people. In fact, these are the only five times this word, tharseō (thar-seh’-o)—meaning to take heart, have courage, or be of good cheer–is used in the Bible. Being Jesus, it was the exact right thing to say to each of these people and I’m going to show you why.

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A Biblical Perspective on Holistic Wellness

The worst year of my life was probably 2019. I went through a lot of really hard things that year, and was ultimately diagnosed with bipolar disorder. By the beginning of 2020, I was 40 pounds overweight, was distant from God, and in the worst mental condition I had ever been. I was in the mess of a trifecta of unwellness and exhausted from a series of trials and a mental breakdown. Aside from nearly dying, I was in my worst overall health I had ever been.

When we think about our health, we often focus on the physical. But Jesus’ ministry was also about the mental and the spiritual. Yes, he healed illnesses–both physical and mental, but he also cast out demons and challenged people to grow in their faith in God. The Bible makes it clear that we were designed to have a sound mind.

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

2 Timothy 1:7 (ESV)

So, what does wellness look like in a Biblical perspective?

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What is the Best Church for Me?

Getting asked not to return to church really stung. I had done nothing wrong. The pastor chose to believe the lies of another person in the church over me. It didn’t matter that I had physical proof of the truth. I was given an ultimatum and I chose the door. 

It wasn’t the first time I had been let down by a church, but it was the one that hurt the most.  It took me three years to get over that hurt. To be honest, it still stings a little.

I’ve been going to a church for about three years now, but it took about a year and a half before I finally felt like I could call Calvary Chapel of Orlando home. For a long time I just went to Sunday services and occupied a seat. Slowly I got more involved and started to make friends. Now I feel like I’m a part of the community.

Breaking up with a church and finding a new one is a process that can be painful. Maybe you’re looking for a new church because you’ve moved. Maybe you just don’t feel connected to the church you are going to and feel led to move on. Or maybe, like me, you’ve been hurt and you need a place to lick your wounds and learn to trust again. How do you start over? What do you look for in a church?

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Surrendering Dreams

When I got married, like most people, I had a lot of dreams about what my life would look like. In many ways my expectations went beyond just dreams; they were plans. Like many of life’s plans, mine have not worked out. 

For one, I cannot have any more biological children. I’ve grieved this reality for a long time. My six-year-old son, Arthur William, is all I have. I try to cherish my time with him because he’s the only biological child I’ll ever have. I’ve struggled greatly with separation anxiety with him. We were separated for three weeks after he was born because I was critically ill in the hospital and I still grieve that lost time. I wrestle regularly with the thought of him dying even though there’s no real reason for me to worry. A little girl in his Sunday school class recently passed away very unexpectedly. Losing my child is my worst nightmare and that event has hit me really hard. What if I lose my only child?

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Watching “The Chosen” with Discernment

I get really excited each week a new episode is available for season three of The Chosen. I really enjoyed and was encouraged by the first two seasons of this television series that reenacts Jesus’s life and ministry and the life and ministry of his disciples. Season three is proving no different. I have watched the episodes of this whole series multiple times. I know I’m not alone. 

The week of Thanksgiving, the first two episodes of season three debuted in theaters, opening in the top three among secular films. Approximately 108 million people have seen at least part of The Chosen. People are being born again because of their exposure to this series. How many of these people would be unwilling to walk into a church but are willing to watch a video? The impact of The Chosen is amazing! However, I think it’s imperative that we all watch this series with caution. The show feels so real that it can be difficult to separate the imaginative from the facts. (For example, we know that Matthew was a tax collector but we don’t have background details of his family and there isn’t any biblical evidence that he was autistic.) 

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How to Find Forgiveness

I’ve been hurt by a lot of people. Sin is a reality in this world, no one is immune, so people hurt people. This truth doesn’t reduce the pain. A betrayal by a best friend. Being mistreated by a family member. People going back on their word. Gossip. I’ve had to do a lot of soul searching when it comes to forgiveness. 

I’ve recently experienced being hurt by someone that was a part of my family’s daily life. Out of the blue, trust was broken and we’re reaping the consequences on a daily basis, and will be for some time. To make matters worse, they are mad at me and my family when the broken trust was their choice. In the days after this incident I realized that I needed to forgive this person, but it wasn’t easy.

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Check Your Heart: A Call to Repentance

As I cleared debris from the yard, cool air on my skin and warm sun on my face was a huge change from just a few days before. Hurricane Ian ravaged a hot muggy Florida and left us with beautiful weather. However, taking a closer look, one has to remember that the tempests did blow and all is not right in the world.

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When Speaking Truth, Don’t Forget the Love

Lately I’ve seen a lot of social media posts that speak truth, but in a really harsh and ugly way. Rather than lean in and engage with their words, I get the urge to fight them in the comments…even if I agree with their point.

One lady wrote in all caps, something to the effect of, “WOMEN CALLED TO BE PASTORS ARE DECEIVED BY SATAN AND LIVING IN SIN!” My immediate urge was to write some fighting words in the comments but thought better of it. I then stopped and thought, “That post is not going to draw anyone closer to Jesus, so whether I agree with her or not, my comments aren’t going to help the matter.” 

Another lady posted that if your pastor didn’t stand up and say something about Roe vs Wade the Sunday after the law was overturned, that’s a huge red flag and you should reconsider attending that church. I commented something like, “My pastor didn’t mention it, but I don’t think he needed to. The church is very involved with supporting a Christian pro-life womens clinic and I know that the congregation was all celebrating. I think you need to reevaluate your statement.” The reply to my comment began, “WRONG!!!…” and I was then completely torn down. Is this how we are taught to treat one another?

What happens when we speak the truth but forget the love? We miss the chance to glorify God. Believers are drawn away from him and nonbelievers turn their backs completely. 

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Healing Scripture for the Unsound Mind

My brain was sick. That’s how I explained it to my then 2 ½ year old. The medical descriptions in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders (DSM-5) doesn’t thoroughly describe the hurricane that was raging beneath my skull. I was in my worst episode of my newly diagnosed bipolar disorder. I couldn’t function, and yet I had to. My son needed his mom and Andrew needed his wife. Andrew’s and my business needed me. I was as depleted as a person could be. I wanted to die.

Just a few months before, the pastor from the church we were attending asked me to leave. That’s a long story, but the point is that I was without my mind and without a church. My spiritual community was fractured and so was my spirit. I knew I needed something to ground me to the truth. I didn’t have the wherewithal to get there on my own.

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