The Shy Extrovert: My Journey with Agoraphobia

At church with my family, I had my first encounter. I’m not sure if this particular incident triggered the fear or if it was simply the first time having experienced it. I was only four years old, after all. I believe it was Christmas Eve. After the service, holding one of my parents’ hands, IContinue reading “The Shy Extrovert: My Journey with Agoraphobia”

If Anything Can Go Well, Will It?

Is the power of positive thinking enough to overcome circumstances? This is a question I’ve been pondering over the past several months as I drive around Orlando, Florida. The reason I’ve been pondering this question so deeply is that I keep seeing this bumper sticker–if you live in Orlando, you’ve likely seen it too– “IfContinue reading “If Anything Can Go Well, Will It?”

Desert Wilderness

Is it ok for a Christian to sit in a spiritual desert?  That time in a believer’s life when one feels distant from God no matter how hard he seeks him, the spiritual desert, is a term that’s often thrown around but not often addressed.  It doesn’t feel good to be there but is itContinue reading “Desert Wilderness”

Confession

Confession.  I have intimately conversed with suicidal thoughts on multiple occasions. If you have read my previous posts discussing my struggle with depression or had any kind of deep conversation with me, this may not come as a shock to you.  I tell you in light of Isaac Hunter’s death to explain that it isContinue reading “Confession”

Disappointment

I’ve recently faced a disappointment which led to what seems to be a dead-end that presents itself as another disappointment.  The obvious question running through my mind is “now what?” Without really directing it to God, He responds, “wait.” So, here’s how the conversation goes: Me: Now what? God: Wait. Me:  I wasn’t talking toContinue reading “Disappointment”

Black and White

Change has become the new normal for my life.  I always thought that I was pretty good at change but that was when my life had a fluid consistency, like  the comfort of a classic black and white feel good movie, so adding a little splash of color and adventure now and again was welcomed. Continue reading “Black and White”

Dreams and (Un-)answered Prayer?

Lately my mind has been filled with dreams; longings for the future. I’ve been gazing down a winding path of uncertain hopefulness of things that could be. As I mentioned in my last post, I’ve been considering what I’ve accomplished over the past thirty years and where I’d like to be. There is a songContinue reading “Dreams and (Un-)answered Prayer?”

My Plans over 30 Years of Life

Today I turn thirty years old.  About a month ago, when it dawned on me that I was really going to be 3-0 years, I started to freak out.  I was both excited and afraid.  I began asking myself what I’d done with my life, reflecting on my current reality compared to my plans andContinue reading “My Plans over 30 Years of Life”

The Lord of My Ring

I fell off a dock when I was about 8 or 9.  It seemed like it was about ten feet to the water below and I was scared, so I grabbed the edge of the dock and hung on as though my life depended on it.  It really wasn’t that far down and I wasContinue reading “The Lord of My Ring”

The “Sensitive” One: My Lifelong Journey of Depression

I have always been accused of being, “sensitive.”  It’s a labeled I’ve carried well just because it was how I was labeled.  It’s a label I’ve denied, trying to overcome in my own power.  It’s a label I’ve searched deep and high and far and wide for reasons and meaning.  Up and down my wholeContinue reading “The “Sensitive” One: My Lifelong Journey of Depression”