Screams escaped me like a steaming kettle. There was no way to turn down the burner, no hand to pull it off of the heat. My mom was at a loss as to how to help me. She showed me my face in a mirror but I didn’t recognize that girl.
I’ve heard a lot of women who have experienced a health crisis, for example, say, “I’m not strong. I’m sick and I didn’t ask to be.” When my first crisis hit – a health crisis – I suddenly knew exactly what they meant.
I didn’t recognize my newborn baby, my body had failed me and I felt as though I’d failed my son. I couldn’t move forward until I was able to grieve what had happened and only then was I able to begin healing my mind, body, and spirit.